Don’t Pokémon “Go” to the GIAC! Continue reading “I Claimed Every Pokémon Gym in the Tri-Co”: An Exclusive Interview with Haverford’s Best Student Athlete
Not many people can say that they’re French-Canadian Hockey Legend Maurice “the Rocket” Richard, but for the lucky few with a claim to the Richard name, you know that life as a hockey superstar can be, well, different. If you proudly wear jersey number 9, here are some common experiences that are all too real for Francophone sports legends. You played for the Montreal Canadiens … Continue reading Five Things You Can Relate to If You’re French-Canadian Hockey Legend Maurice “the Rocket” Richard
A heroic couplet mash-up about potatoes. Continue reading One Man’s Odyssey to the Dining Center
With the holidays finally over, we all feel the regret that comes with having eaten an entire box of discounted chocolates the day after Valentines day. Instead of bottling up the shame of being a human who eats, why not channel that energy into a detox plan? Some experts advise that the healthiest way to treat your body is to eat in moderation. They tell … Continue reading New Year’s Detox Plan: FGACHLUDP
As new First-Year students are thrust into Haverford college life each year, they are introduced to a long line of Haverford traditions. With classic events like Supa fun, Screw Date, and slipping on the floor of Gum basement, freshmen are bombarded with opportunities to navigate their new home. For most, these experiences elicit fond memories. For a certain unlucky student however, one of these time-honored … Continue reading Freshman Overwhelmed by Responsibility of New Plant
Last Thursday, a Consensus correspondent reported that I can’t, despite my best efforts, find my OneCard. Upon bringing the issue to the attention of the editorial board, the Consensus immediately launched an investigation into whether anyone has seen it. The inquiry accelerated after an internal review revealed that I totally just saw it, like it was literally just here I’m not even kidding. Though the … Continue reading Investigative Report: Has Anyone Seen My OneCard?
In an unexpected move, Haverford College Campus Safety has been officially disbanded. The organization ceased to exist Monday, October 12 when Tom King pulled the plug on its funding, immediately terminating all campus safety employees. “We simply do not have room in the budget for 20 salaried individuals who do the work that 350 squirrels with knives could easily complete,” King revealed in a later … Continue reading Campus Safety Dissolved, Replaced by Squirrels With Knives
Put up some fairy lights As any Pinterest board or Pottery Barn teen catalogue will tell you, no college dorm is complete without fairy lights. Putting up these bad boys will tell your professors and peers that your serotonin levels are right where they should be. Opt for a soft white or pastel to show you have a personality, but nothing bright enough to make … Continue reading 5 Ways To Decorate Your Zoom Background To Make It Look Like You’re Not Having a Mental Breakdown
